Celebrity Worship is one of the more sickening traits of the English Media. We've picked up this bad habit
off the Yanks, who gave us Hollywood and started the Cult of the Celebrity.
Things have gone from bad to worse and nowadays the title of 'celebrity' is
given to anyone who has so much as appeared on a few adverts. There's a whole
sliding scale of celebrity status now, with Hollywood's lowlife being top of
the pile and UK and Australian Soap Opera Stars at the lower end of the scale.
Some people would even be in awe of 'extras', such is the obsession with 'stars'
and celebrities.
The Media is one Big Advert
The English media is practically one big advert to promote the
stars and celebrities and anyone who has so much as even slept
with a Soap Opera star. Pages are given over to idle gossip and
speculation regarding stars and their activities. It's a two
way relationship, the stars need coverage for their fragile
egos, they have to be 'in the news' and they are desperate
to remain 'famous'. The stars phone the media up to tell them
where they'll be, and then pretend to be upset at having their
photos taken as they roll out of some 'celebrity bash'.
Spotlight on the Daily Mirror
An example of the Media pushing celebrity status forward can be studied in the
Daily Mirror. I'd personally never buy any newspaper but I get to read this
one fairly regular. Sometimes it has some good articles, all the 'serious'
journalists, some of whom are from Working Class backgrounds, sometimes hit
the nail on the head. But the Daily Mirror is far from being a 'News' paper.
The Daily Mirror issue of Mon Feb 3 contained more celebrity news than news
of what's happening in the UK. I decided to investigate this particular
issue of the Daily Mirror.
Have an Accident, Become a Hero
A lot of this issue was taken up with the Space shuttle disaster. Sad as it
was, did we really need 10 pages dedicated to it? Bear in mind that 7 people
were killed, whilst here in the UK we have already had 316 road accident
fatalities since Jan 1 2003 ( up to Feb 3 2003) Whilst feeling sympathy
for the Families of these astronauts, remember that the astronauts too
are 'celebrities' and as such are given a lot of coverage. To be fair to
the Daily Mirror it did allow one Journalist to point out the whole space
program was actually not a good thing anyway. The Americans themselves
are looking to claim Space as a new territory they can use, this Shuttle
Mission was not some humanitarian act of kindness, and to call the astronauts
'Heroes' for simply going on the flight is wrong.
George Bush, God and the Arms Race
No-one questions the 'hero status' because these Astronauts are now post
mortem celebrities. Sometimes being killed in an accident can elevate you
to hero status. George Bush, in his speech after the Shuttle was destroyed,
tried to make out the Astronauts were a 'service to all humanity' and also
that they served a 'high and noble purpose'. Even God himself, the White
Christian God of course, was mentioned and a quote from Isaiah came out
from George Bush. No-one called him a mad religious nutcase. The Daily
Mirror then says in its editorial that 'The space race must not die
with heroes.' In Truth, these Astronauts will be used by the USA
military who see Space as another territory to grab hold of.
Don't forget that Americas plans for a Star Wars type shield
is still on the cards. The Space Race is the Arms Race continued,
and also a chance to give the Human Race, or a privileged few,
an escape route in the future as we pollute this planet to death.
Daily Mirrors 'Anti War' petition.
After the 10 page mourning special, we get to page 11 and see some UK news.
The Mirror is against the War on Iraq for now, and has been featuring a
petition which we can sign and post off. The Mirror has since been going
through the celebrity list here in the UK and has been featuring 'stars'
signing the anti war petition. So far we've seen soap opera stars, musicians,
and various celebrities all with a photograph featured of them doing their bit
with the petition, and a few lines saying why they oppose the War.
Celebrities against War
Opposing War is a publicity stunt for a lot of these people; most of
them would probably be off to entertain the Troops if they thought
that would boost their sad little careers. Today's featured 'anti war'
celebrity in the Mirror is Casualty Star Cathy Shipton. She is pictured
in the now familiar pose, perched with a pen signing the petition which
has the Daily Mirrors Name right there in Big Letters. The petition campaign
is called 'Not in Our name', but the wording of the Petition is not radically
Anti War. In fact, it's more like a typical Middle Class whinge. Here's what
it says….
'Mr Blair. I hereby register my opposition to any War with Iraq not justified by
unequivocal UN Evidence.'
It's ok to kill kids really!
So the petition is actually saying 'Yes it's ok to kill loads of innocent
men women and kids if the UN says so'. Don't take the Mirrors Anti War Stance
too seriously. Whilst individual Journalists are obviously opposed to the War,
the Daily Mirror itself, owned by Trinity Mirror, a massive global concern,
is hardly the independent voice of the Working Classes here in the UK or
Iraq for that matter. The Mirror is basically a marketing package to
appease the traditional Labour voter, but it's slummed it a bit in
recent years as it tries to match the likes of the Sun in marketing
trivia and celebrity worship. Page 11 also has a mention of Bush getting
a Poll Boost with two thirds of the USA supporting the War on Iraq, and
a mention that there are 70% of people in Blair's own constituency in
Sedgefield opposing the War. There's an advert for Breakdown cover
insurance.
The 3 am Girls
Page 12 and 13 is taken up by a threesome of Woman who I personally cannot
believe are actually paid good money to write the equivalent of a 12 year
olds diary. You could not call these girls Journalists by any stretch of
the imagination, they don't 'do news', they just blow hot air, and tell
us what celebrity may have been seen out and about. The 3 am Girls are
(at the moment) Jessica Callan, Eva Simpson and Niki Waldgrave. The 3
am Column is a lurid Tabloid layout, with photos of various 'celebs'
and the usual sneaking prying innuendo ridden gossip which the London
based Journalistic Filth seem to think is news.
Dodgy Little Column
This days 'revelations' are a bit subdued because Eva Simpson has returned
from LA (told to do one maybe!) and a third of the column is dedicated to
this 'news'. We're told Eva actually turned down an offer from The Sun
Gutter Rag. Whether it's any principles or just cos the Mirror paid more
dosh is not mentioned. Eva tells us that LA is like a '3 legged tortoise
race' and she has spent 'months in California trying to stir things up
but the celebs there are a joke' In other words they've read her dodgy
little column and not wanted to speak to her. Who can blame them?
Media Trash
The 3 am Girls column is instantly forgettable. Today's goodies feature
an array of soap opera stars, and people famous for being famous. It could
be some star spotted in some movie premier, or an East Enders Star in a taxi
with his girlfriend. Jenifer Lopez is pictured with some bloke, apparently the
Mirrors 'Snapper' in LA has got us this one.(about 2 million photos of Jennifer
Lopez exist, it aint too difficult to 'snap' her.)The 3 am Girls like to knock
other women's looks and dress sense and taste in men. Bitchiness is there
trade mark, and any man who has a go back at them is a 'Bully'.
Cheerleaders of the Sick Cult of Celebrity Worship.
Today's 3 am Girls 'bully' is Steve Mc Fadden an angry bald cockney who plays
an angry bald cockney on Eastenders soap opera. He's a bully because he phoned
them up and asked the 3am snoops to stop harassing his girlfriend. He also
called them c***s and threatened to 'chuck fu****** lager' over them. Fair
comment really. Mouthy Eva also had an ear ring ripped out from her ear
at a celebrity bash. She informs us the girl who done it was a 'scrubber'.
She just cannot resist making slurs of a sexual nature to other women.
Finally Eva warns 'celebs' she is 'back on their case'. Wear clip on ear
rings Eva; I think you and the other pair of bright eyed celeb chasing
air heads may need them. Yes, you may well have university degrees,
but not for common sense. You could take every word ever written by
the 3 am Girls and it would amount to zero. They are the worse type
of Reporters; they are the cheerleaders of the sick cult of celebrity
worship.
A Bit of News
Pages 14 and 15 have a bit of UK news. Half a page is
dedicated to a report on the progress of the Duchess
of York's Child who has had some sort of non life threatening
corrective surgery. Did we need to know? It more celebrity
bullshit. There's a cop been suspended for attacking a racially
abusing someone. More celebrity news with Zoe Ball suffering
'Woe on Holiday'. Some 'Brit' was freed from being kidnapped in
the Jungle in Columbia and a Soap Star from Emmerdale Farm is
being done for assault, in real life apparently. A Citroen Advert
takes up half of page 15.
'I'm not just that fat funny bird off the telly'
Pages 16 and 17 are a Celebrity Two Page special. Some actress called
Lisa Riley from Emmerdale Farm tells us she's 'not just that funny fat
bird off the Telly' She's just moved in with some bloke who's left his
Wife and Kids for this girl who aint just 'a fat funny bird off the
Telly' Maybe the 3 am girls may be able to tell her more. The Mirrors
really pushing this celebrity stuff today.
Wacko Jacko
Pages 18 and 19 have only 4 tiny news articles, some 'eat out for £5'
token scheme is featured, and most of page 19 is dedicated to Michael
Jackson, who is a Big CELEBRITY. Sometimes you become so big that the
normal laws which apply to the public don't apply to you. If Michael
Jackson was a working class man on a Council Estate, he'd be dead or
in Jail. The DUMB PUBLIC still lap up the BULL about Michael Jackson
, despite him being accused of molesting kids. The Mirror is happy to
promote him. It's celebrity worship in its ugliest form.
Almost bored to death
Pages 20 and 21 have a 50/50 news and celeb news ratio. John Lyndon,
(ex sex pistol now media bore) Roy Keane (a famous footballer) and
a scene from a Soap Opera is featured. The Mirror will often use actual
scenes from upcoming Soap Operas to promote the program and to further
endorse the whole celebrity worship bullshit which we can see now a bit
more clearly as we look through the articles. No pensioners mugged yet,
no bad housing estates, no burglaries or all the every day problems
we face. It's mostly London news and celebrity gossip. Let's read on
if we can stomach this crap.
Mild Right Wing Bigot Angle
Pages 22 and 23 have a bit of news, including the Tony Parson Column.
But it's another 50/50 split between celebrity worship and poking around
a few issues that actually matter. Tony Parsons is someone I cannot work
out, I've not read a lot of him, but enough to pick up on a bit of Working
Class lingo. Unless Tony's one of these fake Cockneys (Mockneys) then I
suppose he's a working class lad, a bit like Brian Reade, who does hit
the nail on the head now and again. Today Tony informs us that the Space
Shuttle Astronauts were 'shining examples of how great the human race
could be'. Tony's the Mild Right Wing Bigot angle in the Mirror. It's
what he does best, and you gotta please allsorts with the Mirror. I'm
not dismissing Parsons; at least he expresses opinions. There's other's
too, most of the 'serious' journo's will eventually make sense if they
type enough.
Balancing the News
Pages 24 and 25 are 40% adverts, 50% news and 2 small celebrity 'news in brief'
articles. As many lines are dedicated to telling us of an upcoming TV series
as are dedicated to telling how the Israelis have bulldozed 9 Palestinian
Homes. It's called balancing the news I think.
Lazy Journalists
26 and 27 feature a Mirror reporter going to Madame Tussaud's in London and
taking photos of Saddam Hussein's wax dummy there. Various people are pictured,
one even strangling the dummy in this light relief middle section of the paper.
It's more a celebrity feature than real news. Call it trivia, or lazy ar**d
Journalism.
Agony Aunt
Pages 28, 29 and 30 are the TV guides. You can map out your days routine here if your
into the cult of celebrity worship and soap addiction. Page 31 has an agony
Aunt, Miriam, who passes on advice with the help of a few pictures of scantily
clad couples to illustrate the problems of extra marital affairs and other
sexual matters. She also runs a phone advice line (they all do!) yet has 2
phone numbers for advice to Women on 'how to satisfy your man' It's not that
difficult ladies, don't waste 39p a minute listening to 'Miriam' giving advice.
Men are easy to satisfy, just get your kit off.
Almost done!
That's it! No more news. A letters page follows, even there we find
members of the public writing in to wish celebrities well or otherwise
drag the subject of 'fame' and 'stars' up again. Another picture of
Kylie Minouge is featured, plus a celebrity birthdays feature, wishing
happy birthdays to famous people.
The rest is adverts, sport and a couple of crosswords.
I'm not saying anyone who buys this paper is dumb. I'd be lynched by 500
pensioners in Kirkby Town Center if I did. There is news there, but it's
only 10%, or call it 30% if you include sport as news. Most of the sport is
celebrity worship. The rest of the paper is just a joke.
Newspaper is hardly a good description of the Daily Mirror.
"The press is the hired agent of a moneyed system, and set up for no other
purpose than to tell lies where their interests are involved.
The press of this country is now and always has been so thoroughly dominated
by the wealthy few of the country that it cannot be depended upon to give
the great mass of the people that correct information concerning political,
economical, and social subjects which it is necessary that the mass of people
shall have, in order that they shall vote and in all ways act in the best
way to protect themselves from the brutal force and the chicanery of the
ruling and employing class."
- E.W. Scripps
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